ARE YOU A PERFECTIONIST? HERE IS A TIP FOR YOU!

Er du perfeksjonist? Få med deg dette tipset!

Today we will talk about why we take pride in being a "perfectionist." Many people use it as an excuse to never finish the tasks, or to put themselves on a pedestal for high standards.
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But if you identify as a perfectionist, you are actually setting yourself up for failure again and again because perfectionism creates impossible standards that you are not able to achieve. 
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THE BELIEF IN YOURSELF IS STRIPPED AWAY…

Your experience as a perfectionist is never reaching or never fully reaching your goals. And therefore you have less and less faith in yourself. You become more and more afraid of making mistakes, because making mistakes means you are a failure, right? 
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You may procrastinate a lot, and have trouble concentrating, focusing and getting things done. You refuse to go to work because you feel like everything you need to do is over your head and you worry about not being able to accomplish them. This leads to you staying out until the last minute, putting out fires, and barely finishing anything. But after not mastering the work tasks, the feeling of not accomplishing anything gnaws on the inside...
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YOU ARE COMPLETELY WORN OUT.

This is also the reason why you are where you are today. Stressed and tired. You feel tired of yourself, and surviving and getting through every day. You may live from weekend to weekend, or holiday to holiday, but when the weekend comes you are so exhausted that you can not do any of the things you wanted to do. 
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Doesn't it feel like you are working on a crossword puzzle for a long time when the days are about surviving? Getting through this day too… When you get home to your family you are less yourself than you want to be. You cannot stand, you are not the parent you want to be, and the family is left with a tired, empty, dull and grumpy version of yourself… The hours that are perhaps the most important throughout the day, are rather the worst. And the children and the family are the ones who pay the price. The price for pursuing perfectionism and plundering yourself for everything and everyone else. 
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PERFECTIONISM IS AN IMPOSSIBLE STANDARD.

Perfectionism is about several things, but mainly it is about combining our abilities and what we produce and accomplish in life, with our self-worth. Not only that, we are also looking for an illusion. 
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An illusion that if we do everything perfectly and can take on anything, aren't judged for anything or fail at anything -THEN we are good enough... 
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The problem is that this strategy "backfires" every single time because there is ALWAYS something we can improve in everything we do. If we look critically at everything in our lives, we can always find something to pick on.
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“STRUCTURED SELF-TORTURE”

So if you consider yourself a perfectionist, you have simply trained yourself to engage in "structured self-torture," because you consistently find things that are not good enough about yourself, your performance, your qualities, and your qualities. 
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So when is it time to say that enough is enough and walk a new path? 
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Because one thing is certain: when you act on perfectionism, your quality of life and experiences in life are directly affected. And what is the point of living from weekend to weekend, holiday to holiday when we are so exhausted that we are not able to spend that time like we want to? Because most weekends are like this.
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The solution to perfectionism is multi-dimensional, because it is often associated with other patterns such as worry, overthinking, "good girl syndrome", overwhelm, stress, low self-esteem and so on. And often you also have other habits and patterns where you sabotage yourself to achieve your goals in a good way, with benefits such as income and quality of life at the end goal. 
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SO WHAT CAN YOU DO?

My best tip here and now is that when you do different tasks, you start by defining: "What is good enough", rather than constantly asking yourself the question: "What is not good enough?". 
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When you work on this, you can come a long way adjusting your negative focus! 
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The problem is often that if we are a perfectionist then it is not only in one area of your life, but it tends to bleed out in other AREAS as well. So to really break these patterns then you need to have a solution for every area of your life. It's both about changing your relationship with yourself and with your life, as well as changing the strategies you use to do things, and to get through your days. You need to reprogram your brain to have high standards, rather than no standards. 
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We have no guarantee for tomorrow, so it is important to be good at having a good time every single day. 
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So if you are ready to be a little brave, get good at feeling good, regain control and stop aiming to “survive the day”, then you are most welcome to book a discovery call with me 🙂


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